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		<header>
			<h1>Malnutrition</h1>
			<p>Day 00981: <time>Sunday, 2017 November 12</time></p>
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<section id="general">
	<h2>General news</h2>
	<p>
		I awoke to an interesting thought today.
		For a bit of background, know that I don&apos;t believe in souls or an afterlife.
		I think once we die, we&apos;re gone forever and everything we ever were is just lost.
		Everything about who we are is determined by our physical make-up, including that of our brains.
		Anyway, I woke up thinking about the effect of mind-altering substances on one&apos;s personality, perception, and behaviours.
		If I&apos;m right, and there&apos;s nothing more to us than our physical bodies, these effects are completely explainable.
		If you alter a substance&apos;s composition, you alter its properties.
		If you alter the brain&apos;s chemistry, it performs differently.
		Likewise, the effects of brain-damaging injuries is explained.
		If you alter a machine&apos;s hardware, you alter its function.
		If you alter the brain&apos;s physical state, you alter its ability to perform its job.
		How do you explain these things if there are souls though?
		Clearly, the brain is in control.
		So if souls exist, what is the function that they perform?
		Clearly, if souls exist, they&apos;re not responsible for making you who you are.
		If souls exist, they&apos;re not personality of a person and they&apos;re not the part of a person you&apos;d typically think about wanting to live on.
	</p>
	<p>
		I finally got around to making the upper navigation menu of this website stick in place.
		The catch seems to be that the <code>sticky</code> value for the <code>position</code> doesn&apos;t work as expected.
		Margins around inner elements aren&apos;t taken into account when finding the dimensions of the outer element in regards to element placement.
		As a result, I can&apos;t seem to find a way to use the <code>margin</code> property to properly space paragraphs.
		I almost inserted an invisible <code>&lt;hr/&gt;</code> as an ugly workaround, but in a flash of inspiration at the last minute, I removed the <code>margin</code>s on paragraphs and replaced them with <code>padding</code>.
		This had unintended consequences when dealing with paragraphs that follow other paragraphs.
		Padding, unlike margins, doesn&apos;t overlap with that of neighbouring elements.
		The <abbr title="Cascading Style Sheets">CSS</abbr> selector system is pretty thorough though, so I was able to set the margins and padding of paragraphs within the navigation separately from in the rest of the document.
		That solution seems to work perfectly.
		I&apos;m very happy about this, too; the <code>&lt;hr/&gt;</code> solution would not only be hacky, but also require a site-wide update, replacing every page of the website.
		It would&apos;ve been incredibly time-consuming.
		Sure, <code>rsync</code> would do most of the work for me, but my network connection is unstable and I&apos;d have to constantly be making sure the connection was still up to make sure <code>rsync</code> had a channel to communicate across.
		With the solution in place though, only the <abbr title="Cascading Style Sheets">CSS</abbr> had to be updated.
		You&apos;ve got to love the separation of content from style.
	</p>
	<p>
		At work, I was thinking about how I&apos;ve felt tired and/or weak for about the past week.
		It started with three days of feeling tired for no clear reason, and I assumed that that&apos;d been my gay period.
		After that was done though, I haven&apos;t felt as strong as I typically am.
		Lifting stacks of pizza pans at work has been tiresome for me, for example.
		After thinking on it a while, I came to a new conclusion: that wasn&apos;t my period; it was and still is malnutrition.
		I haven&apos;t been eating right for the past while out of laziness.
		I haven&apos;t wanted to put in the effort to shop for actual groceries or cook them, so I&apos;ve sort of been eating mostly junk food.
		What if this is also messing with my sexual desires?
		I haven&apos;t felt gay since my weak period.
		It&apos;s been like all the sexuality had been drained from my mind.
		For the most part, I&apos;ve been very happy about it, but it&apos;s probably a symptom.
		It&apos;s likely this is a big part of why I never knew I was gay to begin with until recently.
		It&apos;s also worth noting that for this past while, I&apos;ve been much less tolerant to the cold than I usually am.
		If my body doesn&apos;t have proper fuel, what it it to heat itself with?
		By the end of the night, I caught myself feeling bitchy again, and this time, I couldn&apos;t fight away the bitchy thoughts.
		All I could do was refuse to act on them.
	</p>
	<p>
		I started out life dealing with stupid milk products that I was allergic to without knowing.
		By the time I gave up milk products, my mother had put the kitchen in such a state that it wasn&apos;t usable (she&apos;s such a pack rat).
		Next, we moved to Coos Bay, where I started cooking, but my mother complained about the smell of my food.
		I didn&apos;t like the smell of her food either, but as she made the rules, it was only me that had to eat poorly so she could be happy.
		She&apos;d rather have me be malnourished than have to smell something she wouldn&apos;t want to eat herself.
		We moved back to Springfield, around which point she claimed the problem was specifically garlic (she wouldn&apos;t even be specific about what she didn&apos;t like about the smell of my food before), but we were back in our old home: the one with the unusably-crowded kitchen.
		Furthermore, she never really liked seeing my vegan ingredients around, so between my mother and the unusable kitchen, cooking just didn&apos;t work out.
		I moved to my current home, but the move was sudden and I didn&apos;t have basic tools such as pots and pans.
		I was busy with school and work, so I didn&apos;t have time to get them right away.
		How long did it take me to get them?
		How close was that time to when my stupid sexuality started awakening?
		I&apos;m not sure I mentioned my purchase of pots or basic ingredients in my journal, but there was another event around that time that I know I mentioned: the finding out that the stove was broken.
		I should look into how well these events line up.
	</p>
	<p>
		After work and after writing up this journal entry, I headed out to the grocery store for food.
		It&apos;ll be nice having ingredients ready in the morning when I get up instead of heading out for groceries without having first had a real breakfast.
		It&apos;ll be past midnight by the time I get back, but Winco is open all night.
		Come to think of it, I don&apos;t think they even close on holidays, which would mean they never close at all.
	</p>
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